Be Careful What you Wear!

Oddly enough - my clothes have been a big topic of discussion in my circle of friends. Now, it's not unusual for friends to give opinions but it is odd for friends to be downright....honest.

A friend recently told me that my jeans made me look fat and dumpy. I'd like to tell you that I had a snippy comeback and said something brilliant, but I didn't. I just stared at here while she continued on. It turns out that I am wearing jeans that are just too big for me. And that makes me look fat.

Interesting. Being called fat doesn't bother me. I know it's not true. But anything that ends in -umpy sends up sizzling red flags. Dumpy. Lumpy. Frumpy. Stumpy. Bumpy. Ew

But could she be right? The offending jeans were a size 5, and to be honest they were baggy. But it's tough to find jeans that actually fit my brand of wide hips, little waist, short legs, etc. She suggested I wear skinny jeans. Puh-leaze!

Yes, I do own skinny jeans. Yes, they fit me. But no, I never wear them as jeans. Most of the skinny jeans I have ever owned have been cut into shorts. I can't stand the way they taper at the ankles and make my shoes look weird.

She suggested ballet flats. Oh barf! Anyone ever heard of Toe cleavage. She was surprised that I had thought this through and decided I had "foot issues."

Oh well. I went home that day and obsessed over the jeans in my closet. Sure there were way too many pairs that I had grown out of. But did I have to wear skin tight jeans to feel normal?

For the next few days I wore my smaller pairs of jeans. Nothing over as size 3. Most a size 1 or so. I felt like I was going to get a UTI, but I did receive numerous compliments. It also reminded me that I didn't need to eat the snacks put out at preschool. Hmmm... maybe there was something to this "wearing your real size thing."

Eventually, I lost 2 or 3 pounds and the smaller jeans were no longer tight. Just say no to snacks, I guess! But what happens now? If my little jeans become "too big" will I have to shop in the kids department just to look normal? And can a 30-something woman look normal in jeans made for 8 year olds? Oh crap. Why does this have to be so complicated.....


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